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How to Respond, Part 2 Print E-mail


Then there are the automation freaks. What absolutely cracks me up is when people, (and I'll bet more guys do it than ladies,) send "form letters" to a dozen or more people at one time. Great, mass mailings for a soul mate! What next, a special on engagement rings; buy one, and get the next two at half price?

I know guys do this because I've received the exact same response from the same person weeks apart. How touching. They've sent the same letter to so many women they don't even remember whose ads they've answered. And all this time you think you're the one and only and that he took the time to answer your ad and he thinks you are so attractive and have qualities that no other person has and wants to meet you and just you, when in reality thirty some other prospects received the very same letter. Gee, how special. Why doesn't he just throw one big party and then he can have us all over at once to save time. Then later everyone could drive over to the funeral home together to view his dead ass when we're finished with him.

Yep, many guys write one letter, then "cut and paste" it, then send it to every available girl this side of the Rockies. Does this tell me they're a little lazy or just missing a few marbles? One guy wrote and told me how he agreed with a lot of the things I had in my profile when I didn't list one thing he was talking about "in" my profile. And you guys want to know why you have to renew your matchmaker membership year after year. Geesh!

Beware: If you receive a response addressed, "Dear John," and your name's not John, you could bet that the person sending the letter cut and pasted" all of their responses. Delete and move on.

If you really want to meet someone, sending out identical letters to many people all at once may lessen the chances of meeting that "special" person. If you address each ad personally, you will have a better chance of impressing the right prospects.

Take a few minutes, read ONE ad at a time and respond accordingly. Comment on a topic that was discussed in his profile. Mention the fact that you enjoy doing the same thing(s), that is if you do, and by all means, compliment, compliment, compliment. For most of us, except our mass serial writers, there's obviously a reason we responded to a particular ad, we apparently liked something we saw or something that was written. Let him know what attracted you to his ad. People take compliments like candy, and you know the old saying, "Flattery gets you everywhere." (Guys, you won't even need a map to get you "everywhere" here!)

If he had a great photo (we know what the odds of that are) tell him. Mention what a terrific smile he or she has or what deep penetrating eyes they have, or how pretty the Porsche in the background is. Anything, just make sure you sound genuine. If he has a look on his face like he's been constipated for the past month, don't tell him what a beautiful smile he has. But do let him know what attracted you to his ad. Tell him that dark hair and moustaches really turn you on or you love to take rides on big oP Harleys. Guys love to hear this stuff.

Ladies, if you answered an ad based on a guys' six-figure income, you'll have to come up with something a little catchier than "I read your ad and really like the incredible bulge in your pants. No, not that one, the one in the back pocket!" Try real hard, pretty please, to keep the conversation geared toward the other person, and not on you, you, you, at least in the beginning.

I also suggest that you read more into what is being written than just what's on the surface. If a guy writes "Nice set of...." and that's it, is he worth responding to? I would think twice. In a way he's not even asking for further contact.


 
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