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What to Look For in Your Mate, Part 3 |
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I did happen to notice that most guys didn't appear to be too concerned about age. If they were, they wouldn't have listed such a big range. His age is 30, his match range is 23-27. His age is 40, his match range is 20-29. His age is 50, his match range is 18-20. His age is 65, so his IQ must be 20. I'll bet the entire female population over the age of 30 have noticed guys seem to want women half their age. Not ALL mind you, just a high percentage. So if you guys put an age the same or even older than your own, pat yourself on the back because I recognize and applaud you.
What do I dare say about this age thing? It's been long standing that guys, especially those who fall into this "middle age" range, feel they need to be with a younger woman to make them feel younger. If I were a guy dating someone half my age, the only thing I would feel is like I was a babysitter.
Every once in a while you will see a younger man with an older woman, but not very often. It's like there's an |
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How to Respond, Part 1 |
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Now that the kids are in bed and the boyfriend's out for the night (oh, just kidding) you find yourself browsing through the personals, and eventually, you come across one that piques your interest enough to respond. You sit down at the computer, stare dreamy eyed into the monitor and all of a sudden it hits you. Blamo! Writer's block has set in and you find yourself at a loss for words. Gee ladies, that's something that doesn't happen with us very often now, does it? Now that you've built up the courage to sign up for this thing, that is after browsing six months for free, and you have a "cutie" you want to contact, quit stalling and get to work. Okay, it's forty-five minutes later and you're still sitting in front of a blank screen. Chances are pretty damn slim of meeting someone if you keep this up much longer. How do you know what to write so you don't come across sounding like a blithering idiot or insecure weenie? I used to have a heck of a time coming up with stuff to tell friends and family let alone a complete stranger, but I figured out I |
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How to Respond, Part 3 |
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There's a difference between complimenting people's attributes and being rude and crude. If you think the above statement was a compliment, fine, but I think it says a lot more about where the guy's mind is. Of course men usually do have their minds "there," but you may want to tone it down a bit, especially if you're truly interested. If you're not, go ahead and be rude and crude so you can spend the rest of your life sending out mass mailings and ordering cheap, blow up dolls.
Of course, there are stories about crude guys trying to take advantage of women they meet on the Internet, so this is why is it so important to read between the lines. If the guy comes off sounding like he's too good to be true, watch out, he probably is. And by gosh, be leery of anyone who talks about "rough sex," bondage and other stuff like that, especially in the first email. If this is something you are curious about and want to learn more, take classes for Pete's sake, otherwise you'll be taking the risks right along with the curiosity. Use common sense! If something doesn't feel right or look |
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How to Respond, Part 2 |
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Then there are the automation freaks. What absolutely cracks me up is when people, (and I'll bet more guys do it than ladies,) send "form letters" to a dozen or more people at one time. Great, mass mailings for a soul mate! What next, a special on engagement rings; buy one, and get the next two at half price?
I know guys do this because I've received the exact same response from the same person weeks apart. How touching. They've sent the same letter to so many women they don't even remember whose ads they've answered. And all this time you think you're the one and only and that he took the time to answer your ad and he thinks you are so attractive and have qualities that no other person has and wants to meet you and just you, when in reality thirty some other prospects received the very same letter. Gee, how special. Why doesn't he just throw one big party and then he can have us all over at once to save time. Then later everyone could drive over to the funeral home together to view his dead ass when we're finished with him.
Yep, many guys write one |
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How to Respond, Part 4 |
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The first few emails should be very basic and simple. Once you have established a little email rapport, you need to decide whether to go to the next level, thus, contacting each other via a device Alexander Graham Bell invented back in 1876. Some of us computer geeks forget we can still contact people this way. (Well, I myself am not really a computer geek, but I sure can play a mean round of Free Cell.)
Writing back three or four times should be sufficient to decide if you want to continue communication. Although I know many people like to write back and forth longer to make them feel more comfortable. This is fine. But you can learn quite a bit about someone from just a few emails, so if it feels okay, go ahead and exchange phone numbers at this point. If you're like me and misspell every other word you type, you may prefer the phone option, if for no other reason than to give your dear old spell check a break.
If you find yourself emailing for months at a time, there may be a problem brewing somewhere. Guys have told me repeatedly that there are women who just |
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