Home

Puppy Care
Organic Gardening
Digital Photos
Carp Fishing
Join SheDate’s quality lesbian dating community and find your true love.

Wholesale Shoes

User Login

When to Respond, Part 3 Print E-mail


So is there etiquette as to the time frame we should respond? We don't want to appear anxious or desperate, but then again we are, aren't we? After hours of anguish, you decide now is as good a time as ever to respond so you go ahead and write back that evening. But then the process starts all over again waiting for his second response. You sit there all day wondering if you said the right thing, or if you said too much, too little, or you start wondering if you're the wrong astrological sign, or maybe he's wanting a blonde, or is he going to have problems with your three adorable kids?

One word: Chill out! (Okay, that was two words, but if you say them real fast, it kind of sounds like one word.) You don't have to spend every breathing moment fixated on the computer. Take a deep breath, do some chores, exercise or catch up on the local news. Or try something different like playing with the kids or calling Grandma and Grandpa. Believe it or not, your computer will still be there when you return. Plus, if people start commenting on the fact that you are starting to resemble your computer, it could be that you're spending way too much time in front of it. Back off a little.

Realistically, "some" time should go by before responding, at least to the initial response. If you respond the minute you receive it, it gives the recipient the idea that you're online twenty-four hours a day, thus giving him the idea you have no life, even though this may be the truth. I read once "you should wait at least twenty-four hours before responding" so that your desperation doesn't pour through. That's twenty-four hours after each and every email. One a day? Boy, someone out there sure has a lot of time on her hands. One day for the first response is fine, but not after every single correspondence. Now if you're twenty-five years old and have all the time in the world, fine, wait to write back until your little heart's content. But there are some people out there who are so old they don't even buy green bananas. Respond whenever, just don't get all stressed out over it. Besides, the other person is probably sitting on the other end patiently waiting for your response as well.

I also have heard it said that you shouldn't write back to anyone over the weekend, that you want to give the person the impression that you are busy. Well I've got news for you, sister; menopause doesn't wait for weekends, and therefore, neither do I! Period. If we were inundated with dates and other activities we wouldn't be Internet dating now, would we?

I used to think women were the only creatures who had absolutely no patience when it came to waiting for a response, but I found guys would email back within hours if not minutes wanting to hook up after the initial contact. They would even want to get together the next day. As for me, even though I tend to respond fairly promptly, there have been times when it would be days before I returned his email because of a busy work project or if I left town for the weekend.

The guy would write back thinking I had met some other hunk and was probably on my honeymoon if I didn't respond the same day. I kid you not. I almost feel obligated to write back within the minute so I won't get yelled at.

Okay, if you write too soon, you're desperateand if you wait too long you're apparently not all "that" interested. So what's the answer? My advice is, respond whenever the hell you want!
Many people will assume if the person doesn't respond within twenty-four hours he/she must not be interested. But I give a person a week before I write them off. They could be on vacation, have a deadline for a project, or are trying to get the soon-to-be-ex out of the houseanything. Or maybe it's because they're wading through tons of responses like I had (yeah, right!) and haven't had a chance to get back to each and every one.


  No Comments.
Discuss this item on the forums. (0 posts)